Rapid weight loss looks appealing, but it comes at a dramatic cost
They all want it: weight loss. And when dieting hasn’t worked and there are advertisements for weight loss medications on the back of every bus, their social media feeds are saturated with weight loss transformations, and every relative seems to casually mention that they need to look after their “health”… Well, weight loss medications or surgery that promises a ‘quick fix’ start to look mighty appealing.
But what many clients don’t realize is that rapid weight loss doesn’t just change their body – it also profoundly impacts their emotions, relationships, and sense of identity. There’s a reason that divorce rates double after bariatric surgery, after all. Just last week I had a client tell me, “This is what I wanted so I don’t know why I’m feeling so panicked about it”.
Many clients experience a kind of psychological whiplash from rapid weight loss; their body changes faster than their mind adapts.
I’m no psychologist, but it doesn’t take an advanced degree to realize that there’s an emotional fallout from rapid weight loss. Clients tell me about:
- Identity confusion
They’ve spent years in the role of the “fat friend” and they feel lost when that identity suddenly disappears. The world interacts with them differently, too, and they haven’t had time to figure out who they are in this new body. This is one of the reasons I put so much emphasis on my clients having “a life” outside of what they look like. I encourage them to pursue hobbies, etc., not just because it’s part of holistic health, but because it also helps to build their sense of self. - Loss of emotional coping tools
My clients have used food as a tool to regulate their emotions. So when food is abruptly lost to them (either through having no appetite when on weight loss medications, or through alteration of their stomach capacity after surgery), they lose a self-soothing strategy before they’ve developed a healthier replacement. - Fear of regain and body distrust
Because the process happens so fast, it often feels out of control. And they feel disconnected from their hunger and fullness cues. This can mean that they don’t trust their body to know how much they should eat and they can become hypervigilant and terrified of “undoing” their results.
I’m already frustrated by what feels like a lack of screening for disordered eating before recommending weight loss surgery or weight loss medications. And now I think I can add a lack of emotional readiness to the list. Because most weight loss interventions like this focus on behavioural readiness – can they follow the plan, take the medication, stick to the protocol? But emotional readiness is not even on the radar.
This is why I believe need to help our clients to build safety with food instead of chasing weight loss. With my Food Freedom Framework, weight loss is never the focus. Instead, it’s a side-effect of healing their relationship with food – and it happens slowly. While a lot of your clients may find it frustrating that their weight doesn’t drop straight away, in my experience it shifts when their body feels safe enough to settle at it’s natural weight again. And the whole process is calm, stable, and emotionally sustainable.
Slow change heals deeper
- Clients learn to feel safe around all foods, rather than fearing loss of control and losing their progress
- Emotional regulation skills develop alongside physical changes – food is no longer the key tool they’re using to cope
- Self-worth becomes uncoupled from the number on the scale – they’re so much more than the “fat friend”!
- The transformation lasts because it’s built on self-trust, not self-punishment. You can’t hate yourself healthy, because self-hatred is the opposite of healthy!
In other words, slow change doesn’t just protect emotional health, it’s what makes the results last as well.
Rapid weight loss looks like progress… but it often leaves clients emotionally fragile and vulnerable. I think we need to help our clients see that how they lose weight matters. When we guide them to heal their relationship with food first, the physical changes that follow are far less dramatic, but infinitely more meaningful.
If you want to learn the exact framework I use to help clients rebuild trust with food, regulate eating patterns, and reach their natural weight without restriction or chaos, join my free masterclass The Roadmap from Disordered Eating to Intuitive Eating (and where weight loss fits in)
I’ll be going over the Food Freedom Framework that took me over a decade to develop and fine-tune, and that I use daily in my work! I’m not holding anything back in this Masterclass, we’ll talk about weight loss medications, AI, and why our clients need our support to heal their relationship with food more than ever.